Giving is the secret of a healthy life.
Not necessarily money,
but whatever a person has of
encouragement, sympathy and
Giving connects two people,
the giver and the receiver,
and this connection gives birth
to a new sense of belonging. 4
Words are how we express aspects of who we are;
but words, in and of themselves, do not define us.
We cannot measure a person;
the depths of their emotions – solely based upon words.
It is important to get the "big picture",
which includes tone of voice, body language and eye contact
and the sharing of space.
Sadly, those who were raised in dysfunctional circumstances,
or are abuse or addiction survivors,
learn that negative statements are "normal"
in their every day life;
simply because they've never known another way.
They are so wounded that,
if they are fortunate enough to find someone
who is not abusive to them,
they will feel uncomfortable
and push to cause the reactions / words
that they think are "loving statements",
thereby manoeuvring the situation into a semblance
of “familiar territory”; a rather twisted “comfort zone”.
How about your tongue,
your words . . .
do they curse,
Do they lift up,
or tear down?
Use them wisely. . .
build – not destroy;
be an encourager.
With the “big picture” verbal communication, we begin to teach,
and pattern what someone’s life will be like.
With the “big picture” verbal communication,
someone begins to learn,
and pattern, what their life will be like.
who is truly understanding,
who takes the trouble
to listen to us as we consider our problems,
can change our whole outlook on the work. 5
What is your defining moment?
If you don’t yet know
whose “child” you are,
or what’s best for you . . .
why not begin your journey of self-discovery
Not sure where, or how, to begin?
Explore some of the links on the site,
There are resources that may help you get going . . .
Life: This Is Not A Rehearsal
“I grew up knowing I was different,
and I hated it.
I was born with a cleft palate,
and when I started school,
my classmates made it clear to me
how I looked to others:
a little girl with a misshapen lip,
When schoolmates asked,
‘What happened to your lip’,
I'd tell them I'd fallen
and cut it on a piece of glass.
Somehow it seemed more acceptable
to have suffered an accident,
than to have been born different.
I was convinced that no one
outside my family could love me.
There was, however,
a teacher in the second grade who we all adored
- Mrs. Leonard by name -
She was short, round, and happy
- a sparkling lady.
We had a hearing test annually: the whisper test.
Mrs. Leonard gave the test to everyone in the class,
and finally it was my turn.
I knew from past years that as we stood against the door
and covered one ear,
the teacher sitting at her desk would whisper something,
and we would have to repeat it back—things like:
‘The sky is blue’
‘Do you have new shoes?’
I waited there for those words
that God must have put into her mouth,
those seven words that changed my life.
Mrs. Leonard said,
in her whisper,
‘I wish you were my little girl.’
Those seven words changed my life.” 1
That's incredible isn't?
That's all it took!
. . . a defining moment . . .
Seven words can change someone's life.
That is the power of the tongue.
Remember the little rhyme from childhood,
"Sticks and stones can break my bones but words don't hurt me"?
Whoever said it might have been deaf.
more than that, it's a lie.
Words are very powerful.
Words can hurt or heal,
build up or tear down, comfort or curse.
Relentless negative words and put-downs
can be devastating.
That is also the power of the tongue.
Sticks and stones may break our bones and hurt us physically.
But words, some words. . . . .
are much more hurtful emotionally
and they leave longer
and deeper scars.
Yet, as those seven words above have shown,
there are also encouraging words,
loving words . . .
There is a driving force inside of each and every one of us,
called love – for we are driven by love:
to love and be loved is the ultimate of all human existence.
Life is meaningless without love . . .
Love is the reason for living,
the driving force towards accomplishments,
value, blessings, life itself.
Love breaks all barriers,
and overcomes all.
Words are the bridge over the barriers between people;
here, there and everywhere;
a word-bridge called “dialogue” . . .
. . . it allows our soul to fly above all the chaos in this world.
The most important thing in communication
is to hear what isn't being said.
To be listened to is, generally speaking,
a nearly unique experience for most people.
It is enormously stimulating.
It is small wonder
that people who have been wanting/demanding
all their lives to be heard
so often fall speechless
when confronted with one
who gravely agrees to lend an ear.
People clamor for the freedom to express themselves
and for knowing that they count.
But once offered these conditions,
they become frightened. 2
 The Whisper Test (I Wish You Were My Little Girl) ~Mary Ann Bird
 ~Robert C. Murphy
 ~John D. Rockefeller, Jr
 ~Deepak Chopra
 ~Elton Mayo
- All non-referenced text: Klaas+
From Dawn Cove Abbey
Roadside Assistance For Your Journey Through Life
From the eBook: "One! The Journey hOMe", by Klaas Tuinman MA, © 2007-2017
Questions and comments welcomed.
The Whisper Test
. . . there are defining moments in our lives,
even as early as childhood:
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