The Healing Journey

    So part of any healing journey is to reconnect with that child inside: the inner child. And although
    healing occurs in all those who actively engage in that journey - there will always be remnants
    and memories. Dysfunction too often is generational: it is passed on from one generation to
    another. The only way to change it is to break that cycle. The best way to do so is to begin  one's
    own recovery and healing, and then focus on children in one's life. This cannot be emphasized
    too much: I suggest you read Prayer For The Children

    Do you grapple with low self confidence? Or worse still, do you feel as if you are going crazy?
    If your answer is yes for either of these questions, then re-think the circumstances that have
    triggered those feelings. Your partner might have indulged in constant criticism or spoken
    something that has hurt deeply. Or maybe it started early in your childhood. Or your spouse
    might have closely monitored your movements and has isolated you, socially and financially.

    Emotional abuse is so vast and varied that it is impossible to compile a list. Abusers indulge in
    such acts in an effort to control. So, in short, if your spouse indulges in dominating acts that
    depress you, then, it is emotional abuse. If you  are trapped in such an abusive relationship, take
    all measures to protect yourself. Emotional abuse is cruelty. Some acts of emotional abuse are
    also illegal. It causes more harm than physical violence. Not all the Violence is physical
    - read Invisible Violence
Recovery, Overcoming, Healing and bringing Closure are possible at any time.
However, in most cases there are not always easy, simple solutions or 'quick-fixes';
- the journey will often be a difficult challenge with inner work and time required.
If you are ready to make the change / transition to begin your spiritual or healing
journey (or have already begun) and want to do so in the company of others
going in the same direction, why not   write or email me? I may be able to
exchange or share experience for mutual benefit and growth.

I sincerely hope that you take the
Less Travelled Road
and that it brings  awakening  and healing to you.
"Roadside Assistance" For Your Journey Through Life
- Dedicated to helping people return (and maintain)
sanity and decency to life -
From the eBook: "One! The Journey hOMe", by Klaas Tuinman M.A © 2007-2020

Questions and comments welcomed.
    Child, Domestic and Family Abuse and Violence aren't "only" physical: the major impact is
    emotional and mental - although the physical itself is already bad enough (even leading to
    death in many cases). Some of the forms of violence and abuse in our communities and
    culture are so common that they appear to be accepted as "normal" and simply a "part of
    life".  They are not "normal"  parts of healthy, functional lives. They are a blight of
    epidemic proportions, and cause long-lasting psychic devastation in lives.

    They are the results (consequences) of the among others,  psychosis called "alcoholic"
    or "dysfunctional families". The various forms of abuse and violence include: Domestic,
    Family, Relationship, Child, Bullying, Teen (Dating), Gender, Elder & Racial violence and
    abuse. It also includes Rape and Incest, Child Trafficking, Child Pornography, and "White
    Slavery": Human (mostly female and Child) Trafficking.

    People who really want to heal, will find a way; those who aren't ready yet, will find an excuse.

    Some of the illustrations on this page are very graphic depictions. Abuse is not pleasant.
    Victims (children) growing up in dysfunctional families/relationships where violence and
    abuse occur, develop coping, or survival strategies that result in "roles": natural reactions
    to severe dysfunction. The most severely impacted victim  is the "The Lost Child".

    Abuse & Violence are widespread, pervasive and often subtle. People have come to regard
    as "normal". But violence is violence, and abuse is abuse - and the people at the
    receiving end are victims. If you discovered this page by "accident" - please consider that
    there is a reason for everything (there are no "coincidences) - that this is just what you

    Parental Alienation is a form of child abuse: help stop it; click/tap HERE, and also HERE.

    LOVE is caring about the freedom of the other. If parents really care about their child,
    they want him or her to be free to enjoy life.
    Children (kids) learn from their parents (and the environment the  watch, observe and
    experience their parents doing - are the things that "tell" the children "how life is"; what's
    okay; what's acceptable, etc. After  all, that's where we learned (obtained) our basic notions
    about life - and those go (went) very deep!

    Thus, the dysfunctional pattern is usually repeated by adult children of dysfunctional (alcoholic)
    families: a cycle - unless they become survivors, adopt their parents' patterns: a Culture of

    Children who have grown-up in dysfunctional families share these traits: fear, shame and
    anger/rage.  Each of us is a product of our past: from childhood on, along with all the
    subsequent things we experienced, including the recent past.

    The dysfunctional family is maladaptive and deviant: sick. It is an extreme on the scale of
    possible realities - it is time to break your cycle now. Get a life - empower yourself and
    develop your human potential.
    NOTE: This page, like most pages on the site, describes and explains behaviours and
    not the recovery process itself!

    The information on this page describes 'extremes' of behaviour. Very few people ever display
    all of them - or experience all of them. The good news is that although it seems difficult,
    anyone can dig down deep past set behaviours and change their core responses. If you are
    ready to make the change / transition to begin your healing journey, I can help.  Please email
    without obligation (and strictly confidential) To contact me, click/tap  HERE or you can find
    and contact me on Facebook
    Child trafficking is child abuse. Children are bought and sold around the world, trafficked
    within and outside of many countries, for a multitude of reasons. It is a nefarious complex, within
    which children can find themselves a victim of trafficking whatever their nationality or
    immigration status. This exploitation of children can and does happen anywhere. They are
    trafficked for many different types of exploitation. This includes, but is not limited to: *sexual
    exploitation *labour exploitation – such as in cooking and cleaning in restaurants. * domestic
    servitude * enforced criminal activity – such as street crime, fraud or illegal drug creation,
    * illegal adoption, * underage, servile or forced marriage, *benefit fraud.

    Although many people are being trafficked, children are the biggest victims of trafficking: forced
    into slavery, recruited as child soldiers or sold into prostitution. Girls and boys as young as six
    are taken from desperately poor homes and placed as domestic workers with strangers in the
    city. In return, they are promised an education. In reality, they are often beaten, fed on leftovers,
    forced to work long hours and forbidden to go to school.

    Other children are sent instead to work in quarries or plantations, in West African states. Some
    are even trafficked for ritual purposes and end up dead. However it manifests itself, child
    trafficking is child abuse.  It must stop – now.
    Human Trafficking (White Slavery): This is primarily sexual slavery.

    There is a world-wide trade of this form of violence going on. Young girls and women are
    enticed or simply abducted and transported  to some other place to be put into “service”.
    Basically, it is mostly forced prostitution.

    In white slavery, ritual slavery is commonly associated with sex. In general, the nature
    of slavery means that the slave is de facto available for sex, and ordinary social
    conventions and legal protections that would otherwise constrain an owner's
    actions are not effective.
    How to counter it all?

    1. Be the example
       Children mimic what they see and  hear. They learn how to become a man or woman based
       on your example.
       Be an example to other adults, too
    2. Educate
    3. Stand up against it
    Children are at one end of the age vulnerability: at the other end are the Elderly.
    Senior abuse is rampant as well. It is a silent Epidemic of abuse which occurs because
    too many cases go unreported. Elder abuse involves physical and/or emotional mistreatment
    which degrades, coerces, manipulates or exploits an elderly person and/or their resources. It
    includes: physical, emotional, financial and neglect issues.

    Older people are afraid to speak up because they know that if they speak up they  could end up
    in a nursing home or with a guardian taking over their lives. I would be petrified also to speak
    up, considering what I've seen happen to the ones that do speak up . . . This a worse type of
    abuse, and inexcusable.

    Elders often face abuse at home by an abusive relative or caregiver   or face guardian abuse
    by losing their last vestige of independence where you don't even get to choose where you
    want to live or whom you want to take care of you and your money is not considered your
    money any longer and you lose the right to choose.

    1 in 20 elders are victims of violence and abuse.

    Family members cause more than half of all reported abuse in later life. Shame, dependence
    on the abuser, fear of retribution, and isolation from the community are significant obstacles
    that  discourage elders from reporting these crimes. Other abuse occurs in many long-term
    elder care facilities, including hospitals.

    - physical
    - emotional
    - financial
    - sexual
    - exploitation
    - neglect
    - abandonment

    Violence and abuse do massive mental and emotional damage, as well as physical.

    In really bad cases, it brutalizes people (they lose their humanity, and cower in fear): at best
    they grow up and/or become co-dependent.

    Knowing what violence/abuse are, and what causes it, still does not help turn it round: help
    is available.Abuse severely impacts children's development, and seniors' serenity.

    The "Kidsource" Website is an excellent resource  - CLICK to discover how
    violence affects kids.
Abuse is a vast topic, and it's consequences and  ramifications are immense

There are many forms of abuse; only some of them are listed and discussed here.
YOU can help stop the cycle.

If you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem.

Perhaps you need something to help you make it through the day
Physical wounds heal and disappear over time; Emotional,
Mental  and Spiritual damage and scarring do not
A Walk on the Dark, Negative side of Life
Child, Domestic and Family Abuse and Violence
the stark reality of the Dark Side of Dysfunction